My two favorite online NYMag features are "The New York Diet" and "Sex Diaries," which feature a week in the consumption of each. This week's "Sex Diaries: The Musican With Lots of Ones, but no One-and-Only," include a Wesleyan nod:
10:30 p.m.: My buddy starts a conversation with two girls sitting near us by saying something incoherent about the space program. It turns out that they've both just graduated from Wesleyan.
....
3:45 a.m.: The girls leave. One of them allegedly has a shoot for some documentary film house internship she’s doing. My buddy and I eat hummus and play songs on my iPod until six in the morning.
My question is, who are these girls? I would say 90% on each of these: Class of 2008, live in Fort Greene/Brooklyn, one of them a film major. I could do some facebook detective work but maybe I'll just ask around and see who has a a documentary film house internship...
Friday, August 22, 2008
Friday, August 15, 2008
When it rains, it pours
Timeline:
Two weeks ago: received email about job offer. applied. scheduled interview.
Monday: "dentist appointment" aka interview
Thursday, 4pm: email saying, "I can't let you know until HR makes an offer" (do I have the job?)
Friday, 5pm: I have the job!!!
Monday: I need a formal offer letter! Go home during lunch to fill out recruiting forms.
Monday, 5pm: offer letter received!
Monday, 5:15pm: letter of resignation. Can I leave in two days?
Tuesday: filing and forwarding documents like crazy. checkout and signatures. exit interview.
Tuesday, 6pm: training for new job
Wednesday: more filing, emailing. write good-bye and thank you emails. print plane ticket, job packet for new job. reading of internet publications unrelated to job. gchats relaying awkwardness of entire situation.
Wednesday, 5pm: Sayanora!
Wednesday, 5:15pm: pick up steaming bagels from Murray's to bring home to parents, stinking up new sportsac to the point where it will need to be washed
Wednesday, 8:10pm: wheels up!
Wednesday, 10:45PST: wheels down!
Wednesday, 10:55PST: discover parents have not yet left for the airport.
Wednesday, 11:40: Daddy!
Thursday, 12:20amPST: HOME! ye olde manse. nary a cockroach to be found!! sleep.
Two weeks ago: received email about job offer. applied. scheduled interview.
Monday: "dentist appointment" aka interview
Thursday, 4pm: email saying, "I can't let you know until HR makes an offer" (do I have the job?)
Friday, 5pm: I have the job!!!
Monday: I need a formal offer letter! Go home during lunch to fill out recruiting forms.
Monday, 5pm: offer letter received!
Monday, 5:15pm: letter of resignation. Can I leave in two days?
Tuesday: filing and forwarding documents like crazy. checkout and signatures. exit interview.
Tuesday, 6pm: training for new job
Wednesday: more filing, emailing. write good-bye and thank you emails. print plane ticket, job packet for new job. reading of internet publications unrelated to job. gchats relaying awkwardness of entire situation.
Wednesday, 5pm: Sayanora!
Wednesday, 5:15pm: pick up steaming bagels from Murray's to bring home to parents, stinking up new sportsac to the point where it will need to be washed
Wednesday, 8:10pm: wheels up!
Wednesday, 10:45PST: wheels down!
Wednesday, 10:55PST: discover parents have not yet left for the airport.
Wednesday, 11:40: Daddy!
Thursday, 12:20amPST: HOME! ye olde manse. nary a cockroach to be found!! sleep.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Buzzin + Cisco Adler
So I caught part of the new show "Buzzin" featuring Cisco Adler and found myself really intrigued by it. He's such a minor celebrity, but somehow has been connected to a lot of top stars. Case in point: Mischa Barton, who dumped him after a picture Paris Hilton took of him and his misformed, swollen testicles showed up on the internet. He's also dated Kimberly Stewart and possibly this other girl Lisa, who was the cross-eyed one on ANTM the same cycle as Kim Stolz.
Seeing the lives of people who dip in and out of tabloid culture is really fascinating to me. Unlike major stars, who seem to beat to their own drummer, as the world bends to meet them, clinging to the bottom has a unique set of challenges. The structure of Hollywood is more visible in these types of shows - the "Nos" they encounter reflect the standards of the industry, not the constant exceptions awarded to A-List stars.
One scene in Buzzin involves the benevolently irresponsibly Shwayze needing to appear in court at 8am on a Monday morning. Unfortunately, he has a show in Phoenix after the Superbowl he needs to appear in, and shmooze with the sponsors afterward. After receiving a quote of $10,000 for a Gulfstream (all the commercial flights are booked), Cisco says "Can't we make that $1700?" He knows it's out of their price range. I appreciate scenes like this, that give these reality shows verisimilitude.
Irrefutable piece of evidence that I am totally obsessed with celebrity reality shows:
This weekend I also caught part of "Ashley Paige: Bikini or Bust." I only knew who Ashley Paige was from her appearance in ANOTHER reality show, "Janice Dickinson's Modeling Agency," where some of the models did a photo shoot for her collection. Bad. So very bad.
Seeing the lives of people who dip in and out of tabloid culture is really fascinating to me. Unlike major stars, who seem to beat to their own drummer, as the world bends to meet them, clinging to the bottom has a unique set of challenges. The structure of Hollywood is more visible in these types of shows - the "Nos" they encounter reflect the standards of the industry, not the constant exceptions awarded to A-List stars.
One scene in Buzzin involves the benevolently irresponsibly Shwayze needing to appear in court at 8am on a Monday morning. Unfortunately, he has a show in Phoenix after the Superbowl he needs to appear in, and shmooze with the sponsors afterward. After receiving a quote of $10,000 for a Gulfstream (all the commercial flights are booked), Cisco says "Can't we make that $1700?" He knows it's out of their price range. I appreciate scenes like this, that give these reality shows verisimilitude.
Irrefutable piece of evidence that I am totally obsessed with celebrity reality shows:
This weekend I also caught part of "Ashley Paige: Bikini or Bust." I only knew who Ashley Paige was from her appearance in ANOTHER reality show, "Janice Dickinson's Modeling Agency," where some of the models did a photo shoot for her collection. Bad. So very bad.
Friday, July 25, 2008
A Crisis in Voice
"To thine own self be true"
Easier said than done, Shakespeare. Define: self. Define: true.
I would love to be true to myself, but I simply do not know who I am. I have been thinking a lot about this lately in the context of my writing, and what voice and tone I should adopt in my blog and any future writings I should pursue. Even in the conversational tone I take on my blog, I pull out and heighten certain emotions or perspectives, becoming meaner/more vulgar/more reserved/indecisive, etc., than I am in real life.
Take the post on my waxing disaster. I was inspired both by the detailed vulgarity of Tracie Egan and this other book I read so fast and furious I can't remember the title or the author (it was written by a USC film school alum, about him sitting around masturbating and cheating on his girlfriend and in general being an asshole all the time. one of the most deadpan vulgar things I have ever read, compelling in its oddity). I CAN write like that - I can write even grosser and weirder stuff, but I don't tend to finish or share such things because I don't want my name attached and it makes me uncomfortable. Maybe I am just experimenting in my style, dabbling in the growing trend of writing in grotesque detail about sex and hygiene . However, there's something very disorienting about being able to produce a work that falls so far outside how you normally write and think. It's even more disturbing if you like it. (Along this vein, apply last two sentences to the weirdest shit you ever had).
So, as usual, I am the worst taxonomist in history. I find myself utterly unable to classify myself and my ideas, when I am sure all of this is crystal clear to outsiders. (deprecation of self: this is a standard theme of my work). I am hopeless. I would also like to point out that as soon as I wrote that parenthetical statement, I also wanted to write another sentence saying that this is complemented by an underlying faith in my self. Which I then wanted to amend to "overall concern in the self-confidence arena" or some mumbo-jumbo like that.
So I am writing circles around myself, and feeling a general lack of confidence in...everything. Perhaps I will resume with another post once this crisis has been averted. Or just post another recipe.
Easier said than done, Shakespeare. Define: self. Define: true.
I would love to be true to myself, but I simply do not know who I am. I have been thinking a lot about this lately in the context of my writing, and what voice and tone I should adopt in my blog and any future writings I should pursue. Even in the conversational tone I take on my blog, I pull out and heighten certain emotions or perspectives, becoming meaner/more vulgar/more reserved/indecisive, etc., than I am in real life.
Take the post on my waxing disaster. I was inspired both by the detailed vulgarity of Tracie Egan and this other book I read so fast and furious I can't remember the title or the author (it was written by a USC film school alum, about him sitting around masturbating and cheating on his girlfriend and in general being an asshole all the time. one of the most deadpan vulgar things I have ever read, compelling in its oddity). I CAN write like that - I can write even grosser and weirder stuff, but I don't tend to finish or share such things because I don't want my name attached and it makes me uncomfortable. Maybe I am just experimenting in my style, dabbling in the growing trend of writing in grotesque detail about sex and hygiene . However, there's something very disorienting about being able to produce a work that falls so far outside how you normally write and think. It's even more disturbing if you like it. (Along this vein, apply last two sentences to the weirdest shit you ever had).
So, as usual, I am the worst taxonomist in history. I find myself utterly unable to classify myself and my ideas, when I am sure all of this is crystal clear to outsiders. (deprecation of self: this is a standard theme of my work). I am hopeless. I would also like to point out that as soon as I wrote that parenthetical statement, I also wanted to write another sentence saying that this is complemented by an underlying faith in my self. Which I then wanted to amend to "overall concern in the self-confidence arena" or some mumbo-jumbo like that.
So I am writing circles around myself, and feeling a general lack of confidence in...everything. Perhaps I will resume with another post once this crisis has been averted. Or just post another recipe.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Cilantro-Jalapeno Hummus
Trader Joe's has some amazing food, and for the second time I was inspired to re-create one of their recipes that features chickpeas. Beans are incredibly easy to make and incredibly cheap, so I figure if I can get the seasoning right, I might as well do it myself. Unfortunately, my food processor does not whip the beans into the creaminess of store-bought hummus, and instead yields a slightly more watery, gritty texture. While I am still working out the kinks (more water? more oil?), this third batch of hummus has been my most successful yet. Adding the jalapeno and cilantro flavors makes this hummus more appropriate with corn chips than pita chips. I have a ripening avocado in my fridge so I have a feeling that I might make some guacamole to for a drinks 'n dip night.
Cilantro and Chickpea Hummus
1 and 1/2 cans chickpeas
1 and 1/2 limes + equal amount water to make the beans whirr in the food processor
1 jalapeno (I removed half the seeds - remove none or all to adjust the heat)
2 big handfuls cilantro
2-3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
2 + cloves garlic
sea salt
pepper
pinch cumin (this is the secret ingredient. all hummus needs a little of this)
Mince the garlic in the food processor. Add the beans, lime juice, and enough water to thin it out, and whirr away. It also is fine to add a tbsp or so of oil at this point. I have a small food processor so this alone takes a couple batches, and involves me transferring ingredients into a bowl as soon as they are pureed.
Chop up the jalapeno and the cilantro in the food processor. I add some water and oil to make it whip up better. I also think it's good for these spices to have oil incorporated into them.
In a bowl, stir up all of the pureed ingredients and season to taste, adding a generous amount of sea salt and a few cranks of pepper (use pepper from a grinder. it's the only way). Add the dash of cumin and notice how it changes the flavor. At this point I usually go back and add more of something. This time I added that extra half can of garbanzos, more lime, and more cilantro, because it was a bit too spicy, then added salt/pepper/cumin on top of that. If the flavors taste a little off, or you're still not sure if it needs an extra something, it's great to just pop it in the fridge and let it rest for awhile. There has to be time for the flavors to meld. I made my hummus an hour ago and just ate some of it with some yellow corn chips. Perfection. I'm excited to make this dish again - I can't say I've ever seen anything like it before, and the green speckling throughout the off-white puree looks gorgeous and maybe a bit mysterious. What I wouldn't give for this dip with a mojito right now!
Cilantro and Chickpea Hummus
1 and 1/2 cans chickpeas
1 and 1/2 limes + equal amount water to make the beans whirr in the food processor
1 jalapeno (I removed half the seeds - remove none or all to adjust the heat)
2 big handfuls cilantro
2-3 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
2 + cloves garlic
sea salt
pepper
pinch cumin (this is the secret ingredient. all hummus needs a little of this)
Mince the garlic in the food processor. Add the beans, lime juice, and enough water to thin it out, and whirr away. It also is fine to add a tbsp or so of oil at this point. I have a small food processor so this alone takes a couple batches, and involves me transferring ingredients into a bowl as soon as they are pureed.
Chop up the jalapeno and the cilantro in the food processor. I add some water and oil to make it whip up better. I also think it's good for these spices to have oil incorporated into them.
In a bowl, stir up all of the pureed ingredients and season to taste, adding a generous amount of sea salt and a few cranks of pepper (use pepper from a grinder. it's the only way). Add the dash of cumin and notice how it changes the flavor. At this point I usually go back and add more of something. This time I added that extra half can of garbanzos, more lime, and more cilantro, because it was a bit too spicy, then added salt/pepper/cumin on top of that. If the flavors taste a little off, or you're still not sure if it needs an extra something, it's great to just pop it in the fridge and let it rest for awhile. There has to be time for the flavors to meld. I made my hummus an hour ago and just ate some of it with some yellow corn chips. Perfection. I'm excited to make this dish again - I can't say I've ever seen anything like it before, and the green speckling throughout the off-white puree looks gorgeous and maybe a bit mysterious. What I wouldn't give for this dip with a mojito right now!
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Hygiene Hypothesis
The Times Magazine had two good articles this weekend about health.
Here's one supporting the "hygiene hypothesis," reintroducing intestinal worms into the body to cure Crohn's, hay fever, and M.S.:
"The Worm Turns"
Another one talking about the illusion that we can have control over our health by controlling "stress," and how cultural ideas of what makes a person "well" or "unwell" are used to explain cancer:
"Stress Test" by Peggy Orenstein (I've read one of her books in a sociology class before, so I'm rather biased towards her work)
Here's one supporting the "hygiene hypothesis," reintroducing intestinal worms into the body to cure Crohn's, hay fever, and M.S.:
"The Worm Turns"
Another one talking about the illusion that we can have control over our health by controlling "stress," and how cultural ideas of what makes a person "well" or "unwell" are used to explain cancer:
"Stress Test" by Peggy Orenstein (I've read one of her books in a sociology class before, so I'm rather biased towards her work)
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Pensive - Pensieve
In high school, I remember emerging from intense sport seasons and having FREE time after months of school, practice, meet, dinner, homework, sleep. repeat. I would suddenly start thinking again, having random and creative thoughts. Only then would I realize how busy I had been.
Anyway, I guess I have been less busy (and/or there is no good television on...) and I've been inspired by a few things.
In my research on Epstein-Barr, and many accompanying fatigue illnesses (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, thyroid problems, etc.) I got really interested in the subjectivity of illness. The ability of the mind to articulate its state is limited. When we do express our illness, it lives in the context of our understanding of how illness works and the notions of the society around us. What is "well"? What is "sick"?
Take the state of "blackout drunk," for example. This state is particularly complicated because it pulls in ideas of memory, and also self-presentation. If I go in and out, but have moments where I don't remember what happened, is that blackout? What if I remember when someone reminds me? Perhaps there is one extreme that everyone agrees on, but the point is that we don't live in extremes, but the moment someone puts their behavior into a yes/no category they are assigning qualities to their behavior that may or may not have actually occurred. Furthermore, people have plenty of motivation to underplay or highlight their state of drunkeness, making reporting of this information even less reliable. "I was soo blackout" is such a cliche - an excuse for bad behavior, a way to show off. Denial of a blackout state comes with its own line of reasoning. So it seems if I were to order these things:
1) Sensory experience
2)Interpretation of experience: Where does my experience fit within the categories/experiences I know? Do I want to exaggerate/deny my state for any reason?
3) Articulation of experience
4) Understanding of experience by others and self - symptoms change based on categorization and feedback. i.e. "not that bad" for a blackout. Experience can be validated/negated by peers
Anyway. I decided I want to learn more about societal understanding of illness. Epidemiology was one of my surprise favorite classes (I wrote my final paper on childhood obesity and it was sooo much fun! and proffy liked it!). I had read a little bit about medical anthropology in some random course packets ( parts of Emily Martin's Flexible Bodies and Susan Sontag's AIDS and its Metaphors) so I checked them out of the NY Public Library and started a skim through.
Martin's work will be the most interesting, I think. I already looked through all the pictures :). Without having read more than the abstract/intro and the random chapter I read a few years ago, it seems her idea is that we used to think of immunity as castle/fortress model, with the body as a closed space with open orifices that germs could pass through and must be defended. As we understand the body through new technology and new cultural ideas about "flexibility" these exterior and interior changes emphasize immunity in terms of flexibility. Right now I haven't seen enough examples to make the word "flexibility" resonate in my mind but I'm curious to read more.
Right now, I personally have been very interested in the role of viruses. Traditionally, I think of viruses as infecting, and then leaving. Now, I think of them as being able to permanently alter mental states (lyme disease, that disease you get from cats) and physical states (rheumatic fever, chronic fatigue syndrome, EPV, that virus that makes you obese).
I also never thought of viruses as an environmental factor. EPV and HPV cause cancer, something I associate with too much sun (skin cancer) or not eating a healthy diet (colon cancer). Viruses can also be catalysts for people with genetic predispositions to certain illnesses, initiating Multiple Sclerosis and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Crazy! Viruses are not just COLDS. I feel I have changed my perception so much since that day in biology we had to write a two-sided persuasive on whether or not viruses were alive. Back then, the idea that something not an organism could infect you was something we were conditioned to feel was novel, the same way a prion (what causes Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy aka Mad Cow Disease) causing a disease seemed crazy, since a prion is just a protein.
All of these ideas about viruses freak me out and make me feel like I have no control - so the view that emerges from that for me is that there is no "one size fits all" way to defend the body against contagion - everyone has different weaknesses in their castle wall, so to speak, and every body has soldiers that are quick to recognize one attack and oblivious to another. Moreover, attacks can change immune structure and response, causing even more unpredictability with regards to response. So there's really nothing you can do but feed your little soldiers and keep healthy and not worry too much about it.
...and let me take back what I just said: I also find autoimmunity absolutely fascinating, especially because scientists have founds ways to manipulate the body's immune response in the case of certain allergies, such as peanut allergies. This is where I get really excited about the other book I just read, The Dirt on Clean, which talked about how these opposites
healthy vs. sick
dirty vs. clean
moral vs. immoral
have at times been aligned in every single configuration. Dirt used to be seen as protective; cleanliness a sign of moral suspicion. The polio epidemic, in fact, was so bad in the 1950s because people were too damn clean. The disease is passed by fecal-oral contamination, so sanitation had progressed to the point that everyone was too clean to be adequately exposed as a child, but not clean enough that they would never ever be exposed to that disease. Similarly, many children on farms do not have allergies, so many dust/seasonal allergies are associated with environments that are too clean and give the immune system nothing to do, making it over-react to benign substances. Thus, recently, the idea of dirt as 'exercise' for the immune system, enabling it to learn to react appropriately, has been repopularized. So fascinating!
Anyway, enough about diseases, time to go off and have some Saturday night fun.
(Although I must admit, I am quite tired, and have been all day. Is it me? Is it the Epstein-Barr? What would my lab results say? If they said I was well would I still be 'sick'?)
Anyway, I guess I have been less busy (and/or there is no good television on...) and I've been inspired by a few things.
In my research on Epstein-Barr, and many accompanying fatigue illnesses (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, thyroid problems, etc.) I got really interested in the subjectivity of illness. The ability of the mind to articulate its state is limited. When we do express our illness, it lives in the context of our understanding of how illness works and the notions of the society around us. What is "well"? What is "sick"?
Take the state of "blackout drunk," for example. This state is particularly complicated because it pulls in ideas of memory, and also self-presentation. If I go in and out, but have moments where I don't remember what happened, is that blackout? What if I remember when someone reminds me? Perhaps there is one extreme that everyone agrees on, but the point is that we don't live in extremes, but the moment someone puts their behavior into a yes/no category they are assigning qualities to their behavior that may or may not have actually occurred. Furthermore, people have plenty of motivation to underplay or highlight their state of drunkeness, making reporting of this information even less reliable. "I was soo blackout" is such a cliche - an excuse for bad behavior, a way to show off. Denial of a blackout state comes with its own line of reasoning. So it seems if I were to order these things:
1) Sensory experience
2)Interpretation of experience: Where does my experience fit within the categories/experiences I know? Do I want to exaggerate/deny my state for any reason?
3) Articulation of experience
4) Understanding of experience by others and self - symptoms change based on categorization and feedback. i.e. "not that bad" for a blackout. Experience can be validated/negated by peers
Anyway. I decided I want to learn more about societal understanding of illness. Epidemiology was one of my surprise favorite classes (I wrote my final paper on childhood obesity and it was sooo much fun! and proffy liked it!). I had read a little bit about medical anthropology in some random course packets ( parts of Emily Martin's Flexible Bodies and Susan Sontag's AIDS and its Metaphors) so I checked them out of the NY Public Library and started a skim through.
Martin's work will be the most interesting, I think. I already looked through all the pictures :). Without having read more than the abstract/intro and the random chapter I read a few years ago, it seems her idea is that we used to think of immunity as castle/fortress model, with the body as a closed space with open orifices that germs could pass through and must be defended. As we understand the body through new technology and new cultural ideas about "flexibility" these exterior and interior changes emphasize immunity in terms of flexibility. Right now I haven't seen enough examples to make the word "flexibility" resonate in my mind but I'm curious to read more.
Right now, I personally have been very interested in the role of viruses. Traditionally, I think of viruses as infecting, and then leaving. Now, I think of them as being able to permanently alter mental states (lyme disease, that disease you get from cats) and physical states (rheumatic fever, chronic fatigue syndrome, EPV, that virus that makes you obese).
I also never thought of viruses as an environmental factor. EPV and HPV cause cancer, something I associate with too much sun (skin cancer) or not eating a healthy diet (colon cancer). Viruses can also be catalysts for people with genetic predispositions to certain illnesses, initiating Multiple Sclerosis and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Crazy! Viruses are not just COLDS. I feel I have changed my perception so much since that day in biology we had to write a two-sided persuasive on whether or not viruses were alive. Back then, the idea that something not an organism could infect you was something we were conditioned to feel was novel, the same way a prion (what causes Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy aka Mad Cow Disease) causing a disease seemed crazy, since a prion is just a protein.
All of these ideas about viruses freak me out and make me feel like I have no control - so the view that emerges from that for me is that there is no "one size fits all" way to defend the body against contagion - everyone has different weaknesses in their castle wall, so to speak, and every body has soldiers that are quick to recognize one attack and oblivious to another. Moreover, attacks can change immune structure and response, causing even more unpredictability with regards to response. So there's really nothing you can do but feed your little soldiers and keep healthy and not worry too much about it.
...and let me take back what I just said: I also find autoimmunity absolutely fascinating, especially because scientists have founds ways to manipulate the body's immune response in the case of certain allergies, such as peanut allergies. This is where I get really excited about the other book I just read, The Dirt on Clean, which talked about how these opposites
healthy vs. sick
dirty vs. clean
moral vs. immoral
have at times been aligned in every single configuration. Dirt used to be seen as protective; cleanliness a sign of moral suspicion. The polio epidemic, in fact, was so bad in the 1950s because people were too damn clean. The disease is passed by fecal-oral contamination, so sanitation had progressed to the point that everyone was too clean to be adequately exposed as a child, but not clean enough that they would never ever be exposed to that disease. Similarly, many children on farms do not have allergies, so many dust/seasonal allergies are associated with environments that are too clean and give the immune system nothing to do, making it over-react to benign substances. Thus, recently, the idea of dirt as 'exercise' for the immune system, enabling it to learn to react appropriately, has been repopularized. So fascinating!
Anyway, enough about diseases, time to go off and have some Saturday night fun.
(Although I must admit, I am quite tired, and have been all day. Is it me? Is it the Epstein-Barr? What would my lab results say? If they said I was well would I still be 'sick'?)
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